I have been through much pain in my life, but that is true of most people. I tried to be what I thought was "righteous" and good, but somehow it never worked the way I thought it should. My righteousness truly was as filthy rags. What I've discovered about myself is that, no matter what, God loves me. No matter what, Jesus' blood is enough for my sins. No matter what, the Holy Spirit speaks to me. He is enough, I am not.
I am writing this as I am looking at the love of my life. Not the one whom I married so many years ago. Not the one with whom I had 2 beautiful children. But the one who I trusted all these years, the one who has loved me for 39 years, since we were 13 and 14 years old. I don't know how this works with God, but I know it does. What I've discovered is that I can't put God into any box and expect Him to stay there, expect Him to work the way I think He should. He does what He does, in spite of what I think. All I know is that I cried out to God and He heard my prayers, and answered me in a way I would have never expected or even asked for. But I do thank Him. I don't understand, but I thank Him. As Bill Johnson says, in order to receive the peace that passes understanding, you must give up your right to understand. I don't understand, but I accept, and am eternally grateful, and I am at peace.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Where do they go?
This was written by my sister Cindie. The Lord gave it to her in the middle of the night. I hope she doesn't mind if I post it here on my blog. I think it says alot...
Where Do They Go?
Where does a young boy go when he is not good enough for his mother?
He works harder to be a 'good boy.'
Where does that boy go when he finds that he is still not good enough?
He goes underground. He does the dance that pleases her, but does not walk in truth. He makes that chameleon-like dance his way of life.
Where does a young man go when he has performed his way through childhood and young adulthood?
He finds a woman to marry that is not good enough. He tries to drown out the 'not good enough' sounds with chasing money and other women. It is not good enough for him. Amid all of the performances, he forgot who he really was.
Where does a young woman go when she is not good enough for her husband?
She works harder to be a 'good wife.' She looks better, she gives him what he asks, but she does not walk in truth. She is still not good enough.
Where does a young mother go when she is not good enough for her husband?
She works harder to be a 'good mother and good wife.' She molds herself into what she thinks he wants. She is still not good enough.
She is not good enough. She has lost her true self. Amid all of the performances, she forgot who she really was.
Where does a middle aged, hollowed out woman go when she finds herself lost?
Her children have given her good enough grandchildren.
She knows that she is still not good enough, but starts to wonder why? She is weary of the performances and cannot seem to keep the lies that are her life as straight as she used to.
She starts to remember glimpses of the good little girl she used to be. She remembers that she was good enough for her mother, she was good enough for her family and friends long ago.
....wait! She was once beautiful and good and strong and wise! She suddenly looks into the mirror of the past and remembers!
Where does she go?
She goes into the arms of someone who sees that she is better than good enough!
She goes to her mother who has always thought she was the best!
She goes back and remembers the truth about herself. She stops listening to the talk that tells her that she has never been good enough and starts really hearing the truth of what God says about her.
She was formed by God himself! Of course she is good enough!
Where does an old man go, who was never good enough for his mother and found that his wife was never good enough for him?
Where Do They Go?
Where does a young boy go when he is not good enough for his mother?
He works harder to be a 'good boy.'
Where does that boy go when he finds that he is still not good enough?
He goes underground. He does the dance that pleases her, but does not walk in truth. He makes that chameleon-like dance his way of life.
Where does a young man go when he has performed his way through childhood and young adulthood?
He finds a woman to marry that is not good enough. He tries to drown out the 'not good enough' sounds with chasing money and other women. It is not good enough for him. Amid all of the performances, he forgot who he really was.
Where does a young woman go when she is not good enough for her husband?
She works harder to be a 'good wife.' She looks better, she gives him what he asks, but she does not walk in truth. She is still not good enough.
Where does a young mother go when she is not good enough for her husband?
She works harder to be a 'good mother and good wife.' She molds herself into what she thinks he wants. She is still not good enough.
She is not good enough. She has lost her true self. Amid all of the performances, she forgot who she really was.
Where does a middle aged, hollowed out woman go when she finds herself lost?
Her children have given her good enough grandchildren.
She knows that she is still not good enough, but starts to wonder why? She is weary of the performances and cannot seem to keep the lies that are her life as straight as she used to.
She starts to remember glimpses of the good little girl she used to be. She remembers that she was good enough for her mother, she was good enough for her family and friends long ago.
....wait! She was once beautiful and good and strong and wise! She suddenly looks into the mirror of the past and remembers!
Where does she go?
She goes into the arms of someone who sees that she is better than good enough!
She goes to her mother who has always thought she was the best!
She goes back and remembers the truth about herself. She stops listening to the talk that tells her that she has never been good enough and starts really hearing the truth of what God says about her.
She was formed by God himself! Of course she is good enough!
Where does an old man go, who was never good enough for his mother and found that his wife was never good enough for him?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)