Stones of Remembrance: Desire of my Heart

This is a story from my friend Dana Krouse.

I want to share with everyone something that has just happened in my life. My husband, Larry, and I have been married since Adam and Eve. Just kidding; it only seems that way sometimes. We met when I was 14 and he was 15, dated for four years, then married at the ripe old age of 18… mere babies!!!

For me, all I can say is I watched way too many romance movies and thought that was how our life would be. I soon had a rude awakening!!! However, I thought, “I know, all I need to do is change him, then all will be right with the world!” I don’t have to tell you that it took only about two days into my plan to figure out that was not a happening deal!

Over the course of the past 37 years, 8 months and 4 days (but who’s counting) I had decided I would take responsibility for my actions and leave the rest up to God. I would just settle for mediocrity! (Hmm, was I serving a mediocre God?) We’d been the whole counseling route with me totally believe that God could change him. (You see, I didn’t have a problem!) So, once again, since God wasn’t working on my timetable, I decided to settle. Thankfully God hadn’t decided to settle, He had much bigger plans…

After years of mediocrity, very few joys and plenty of pain, we decided to do something about it. We headed off to Discovery, a weekend retreat that asks, “What do you want out of life, and why aren’t you getting it?” I went into the weekend thinking that Larry needed about 80 percent of the work and me, Dana, only 20 percent. I also went into it with the determination that there were several things that I would never, in a million years, share with anyone! To make a long story short, 30 minutes into the first session, they were asking people why they were there and what they wanted out of the weekend (by the way, Larry and I were in separate classes). Well, blow my socks off if I wasn’t the second person to stand! I started singing like a bird, telling ALL ABOUT WHAT I WAS NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT! There were times that I had an out-of –body experience wondering who all of this was coming from and how that came out of my mouth!

Larry and I did not see each other for much of the weekend, so I had no idea how he was responding to it all. (To say that Larry is not the most talkative or expressive person alive would be an extreme understatement. As I always say, I do enough talking and have enough drama for the both of us.) On the last evening, everyone came together, and we were asked to share what was on our heart. Larry shot up out of his chair as soon as the first person had finished… he jumped up like the Holy Spirit has poked him in the butt with a pin! Larry confessed to the entire room that he had been angry and unforgiving for the entire 37 years that we had been married. He turned to me in front of about 200+ people and said how sorry he was, asking my forgiveness. Now picture if you will the commercial of the man and woman running to each other out in the field… that was us; both of us crying like big babies! It was the most precious thing ever! It wasn’t what he said that got to me but how he shot out of that chair with such urgency and such a sincere heart. A true Romantic movie moment!

There is now peace and joy in our home that neither of us have ever felt before. There is understanding and teamwork like never before. Only God performs those kinds of miracles, and I am thankful for my life everyday.

Dana Krouse